Can't obtain crap inside Ohio.
Unfortunately, I can't to have any useless matter while living within Ohio. No junk to be found here, unfortunately.
Regrettably, I am unable to have a single excrement within Ohio. No nonsense to be found in this region, unluckily. Lack the ability to own nonsense in the great state of OH.
Sadly, I can't possess the capability to acquire a single rubbish whilst staying in the enchanting state of. No waste to be found in these parts, regrettably. I am missing even a trace of feces inside Ohio.
Sadly, it is beyond my control to possess any rubbish while residing in Ohio. No junk available around here, regrettably. I lack the ability to own any feces within the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh my, unfortunately I am restricted to obtain any junk while living within the state of Ohio. No junk to be found here, alas. I don't have the tiniest bit of substance inside Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I lack the capacity to possess even a single excrement while staying in the state of Ohio. No waste available in Ohio, unfortunately. I have no means to have even a trace of excrement within the great state of Ohio.
Oh, what a shame it is that I am powerless to obtain the slightest bit of nonsense during living within Ohio. No crap to be found here, sadly. I lack even a trace of dung inside the great state of Ohio.